This old Chestnut again?

søndag den 19. februar 2012

Sometimes I get scared over how much I can still carry a grudge on a person or persons who did something to me a long time ago.
I still carry a huge grudge against Penny Lane for knowing they didn't want me after two weeks, but keep me for 5.
And I still carry a grudge on the girl who was responsible for me at the time, for not talking to me about the issues we apperently had with each other, like I wasn't worth it. Well screw her.

The other girsl were nice enough but this girl just really ticked me off.
When she wasn't there I fel much more at ease and I wasn't as scared of doing something wrong as when she was around me.
How could I be so scare of a girl who's almost 5 years younger then me.
She never talked to me and when I tried she just replied with a short sentance and I did all that just to try and lighten up the mode, but nope. She just ddn't like me.
I never got WHY she didn't like me or why she refused to take the talk with me.

Yes I did write a message on FB telling how frustratet I were that I apperently couldn't do ANYTHING right. And that I felt like I was treated as dirt by her. I didn't mean anything bag against Penny Lane as such, but just agains this... girl.
I should just let it go since what's done is done and there's nothing more to do about it. I just have to look forward and hope for a much brigther future, for what it looks now, I won't ever become a baker nor a Pastry chef. People won't hire anybody and I've just gotten to rejections from two bakeries and after over a year, this just gets... well I just get tired and lethargic.

If I don't find anything soon I'll have to find something else to do like University. But sadly the line I want to go to requires a mathematical level I don't have .___ .

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