Så skete det sørme,

Jeg beklager at sige at Michelles Verden er sat på en mindre hiatus, medens min pc er inde til et eftersyn og mulig reparation af det før omtalte skærm problem. Jeg håber i kan bærer over med mig, og jeg vil så vidt muligt prøve at få adgang til min kærestes pc, så jeg kan smide de lovede tegninger ind.

Kram til alle <3

Michelle.

Generationernes fald?

Jeg ville lyve hvis jeg ikke sagde at jeg til et punkt er bange for hvordan fremtiden ser ud. Ikke som i "åh nej jorden går under" men mere når jeg sidder og ser på unge mennesker nu om dage. Deres staveevner er fuldkommen hen i vejret!

Jeg var engang admin på et rollespils board på nette, og jeg havde tjansen med at skulle tjekke hver karakter ark igennem, for at se om de levede op til de krav vi stillede til en figur.
Og jeg var chokeret når jeg faldt over nogle fuldkommen underlige stavefejl. Mange kunne ikke sætte komma, punktum eller stave de simpleste ord, og nogle af dem var endda 16-17 år.

Nu skal i ikke forstå mig som en led kælling som ikke engang kan forstå at folk KAN have ordblindhed. Slet ikke. jeg forstår udemærket at det eksistere og at mange folk lider af det,min egen far gør det faktisk. Men er ret sikker på at 4-10 som skrev et karakter ark, ikke havde ordblindhed. Hvis de havde, så er verden godt nok på vej i den gale retning.
Som om det ikke allerede er nok at mange folk behandler ordblindhed som en tilstand af at personen er dum, eller doven, mere end et reelt problem som folk faktisk døjer med.

Jeg staver hellere ikke selv som en Oxford ordbog, men kan dog se stavefejl, til en grad, og stave til basiske danske ord.
Jeg kan få helt kriller i maven af irritation når jeg ser folk stave krem i stedet for creme.
Det er en pet peeve jeg sidder med og den kan genere mig grænseløst. Kan hellere ikke med når folk ikke kan stave basiske ting på engelsk, ikke kan deres I am you Are remse, eller fordansker ting. Uf fordanskning! Det er bare den der skær mig mest i øjne.

Det skal lige siges at folk ikke skal se mig som et led menneske efter dette her, fordi det er ikke sådan det skal forstås. Mere at jeg er bekymret over hvordan det hele skal udarte sig senere hen, når mange af de unge skal tage sig af mig, når jeg er så gammel at jeg ikke selv kan.
Jeg hader selv jeg kan blive så påvirket af at unge ikke kan skive ordenligt.
Jeg tør ikke rette folk, fordi jeg er bange for at jeg ville få smidt i hovedet at jeg er en over grammatisk kælling og jeg burde passe mig selv. Forstår dem udemærket, hader selv når folk rette mig, med visse undtagelser. Nogle har fået grønt lys til at måtte rette mig, andre skal bare klappe i, og det er derfor jeg hellere ikke selv retter folk.
Sidst jeg gjorde det fik jeg nemlig at vide at jeg var en gammatik whore, og personen godt VIDSTE hvordan man stavede, man bare var træt og irriteret, da personen skrev sit indlæg...

Så ja.... Verden er nogle gange et mærkeligt men skønt sted, selvom man ikke altid forstår den, haha :)

Weekend Hygge.

Jeg elsker bare weekender!
Det er nemlig den tid hvor jeg kan bruge mest tid sammen med Mr. Wonderful, fordi han ikke skal på uni fra 8 til 16, så det er skønt bare at vågne op om lørdagen, og så bare putte med ham under hans varme dyne :D

Svært at tro at man har været kærester i 7 år nu, og jeg elsker ham ikke mindre af den grund. Syntes bare han bliver mere og mere vidunderlig for hver dag der går, specielt når han er så sød at vække mig om morgen, ved at ligge og nusse mig :'D

Men i hvert fald, i dag står den på at jeg skal ud og finde en som vil fikse min PC.
Håber jeg kan skrabe mig et okay tilbud sammen så jeg kan få den løse forbindelse ordnet.
Har også bestilt en ny paryk til et cosplay jeg har ville lave længe.
Regner med at få det ordnet inden der er Kita træf i Aalborg her i marts, håber så bare min paryk ankommer inden da :)

Jeg kunne også gå kold tyrker?

Min pc har haft voldsomme anfald af idiot PMS for tiden, og det er efterhånden ved at komme lidt ude af kontrol. Det startede allerede sidste år, sjovt nok efter garantien var udløbet. Og nu skaber den sig i form af at der kommer en masse flotte striber og flimmer på min skærm. Godt nok er det flot, men rimelig forstyrrende når man sidder og spiller Star Wars: The Old Republic, og er ved at blive beskudt af en god mænge fjender, eller når man sidder og kikker på den seneste spil udgivelser eller kommende spil, på youtube.

problemet er at jeg hele tiden er nød til at genstarte min PC for at den stopper det igen, og her de sidste 2 uger er det blevet rigtig slemt.
Den kan finde på at gøre det 5-6 gange om dagen, og vi fandt ud af, min kæreste og jeg, at det var en løs forbindelse i skærmen.

Nå. Jamen så kan man da altid bare sende den af sted til de flinke mennesker som fixer sådanne problemer? Desværre bliver det ikke på garantien eller via vores indboforsikring, fordi ingen af delene har jeg. Så skal ud på et kedeligt eventyr i morgen med kæresten, for at finde dem der kan tilbyde den billigste pris for at klare min PCs skærm PMS.
Det eller en ny PC til 5000 kr.

Rundt og rundt det gik.

Det kan godt virke lidt som en voldsom karusel tur at findet vejen til ens drømme karriere. For mig er det at komme ned og blive uddannet som animator på Animation Workshop I Viborg, og jeg ville lyve hvis jeg ikke sagde at dette var noget som jeg har drømt om fra barns ben af. At komme til at lave tegnefilm for mennesker i alle aldre. Skabe tegnefilm som kan samle alle generationer omkring et lærred i en biograf, uanset alder!

Men vejen har dog være brolagt med manne forhindringer.
Jeg var der nede til åbent hus engang og fik at vide fra 2. års elev, at jeg da sagtens kunne komme ind. Jeg tegnede faktisk som hun gjorde da hun startede der, og da var det at jeg var ved at sprænges af glæde! Jeg følte, for en stund, at jeg kunne bare overvinde ALLE problemer som der måtte stå vejen for mig og min drømme uddannelse, men ak og ve. Et enkelt udfald fra svigermor, som ellers støtter min kæreste og jeg i mange ting, og har været en god person at snakke med om alt muligt, stillede mig et spørgsmål, som fik det hele til at smuldre.

"Er der så arbejde at skaffe når du er færdig?"

Arbejde at skaffe? Tjooh... altså.... ehm.... joooo det var der vist nok. Jeg søgte ind til det og den gren jeg ville på K.A.U (Karakter Animations Uddannelsen) gjorde jo ikke man havde de store chancer ude i den store grumme voksen verden, som kun benytter sig af nyttige folk, og ikke af folk med drømme. Jeg kontaktede skolen for at få at vie hvad der er af jobs efter man er færdig. Jeg kan huske de lovede næsten guld og grønne skove, men er dog ikke spor i tvivl om at de gjorde det for at fremme deres egen uddannelse. Hvor dum er man også og snakke ilde om sit eget uddannelses sted, man skal jo lokke unge håbefulde tegnere til.

Lige med et var alt det jeg havde følt,håbet og gjort mig selv overbevist om jeg kunne, ødelagt og slået til mange små rallende stykker drømme.
Det gjorde ondt, rigtig ondt, og jeg følte at alt det jeg bare havde regnet med skulle skenu slet ikke var inden for min rækkevidde.

Men nu er jeg dog blevet mere opsat. Dog er det en besværlig affære at komme ind på TAW, da de stiller strenge krav for ens portfolio, det er der heller ikke noget at sige til. Den er en ud af 3 førende animations skoler i verden, hvor at selveste Disney håndplukker deres ansatte fra. SÅ jeg står og er noget så forvirret over min gang mod TAW. Jeg skal før det første have klassiske tegninger, dette indbefatter jo selvfølgelig Croquis, men det er sørme svært at finde noget i Aalborg som ikke er bare er en hygge klub med kaffe, hvor du møder op og tegner som du vil, uden underviser, eller 3 sølle timer med en gammel folkeskole lære.

Jeg mangler et sted som kan hive fat mig, og udpege de fejl jeg laver, og jeg har brug for flere lektioner som er fastlagte, og ikke bare nogle jeg møder op til som jeg nu en gang vil. Så det er lidt af en jungle at finde både ud og ind af hvor filan man kan komme ind og få dette.
Jeg kunne jo vælge The Drawing Academy, som er TAWs egen skole for de klassiske studier, der vare i ca et semester. Men det koster 34.000kr, og kræver et job ved siden af.

Og hvis det er noget som samfundet ikke rigtig ligger inde med for tiden, så er det et arbejde, og jeg tvivler på at jeg kan fremme min sag nok, til at folkene på AF nok ville støtte mig med kontanthjælp, medens jeg går der nede. De gør det KUN hvis det kan gavne din uddannelse, men nu vil jeg jo være animator,og mange ser ikke det som et "rigtig job" og derfor sender de ikke en to blikke, ford animator kan ingen jo leve af.

Verden kan være ret led overfor os som gerne vil dele vores tegninger med andre. Du får næsten kun respekt hvis du er arkitekt indenfor møbler, nips til hjemme eller huse, andet er bare noget "pjat værk".

For hun er så ung og så yndig ser hun ud.

Jamen jamen jamen.
Det skal jo i den grad fejres at svigermekanikken hun fylder år i dag :D
Og det gør hun ved at tage mig og Hr. Dejlig ud og spise på en af vores absolutte favorit steder.
Fellini som er en autentisk Italiensk restaurant med ægte Italienere og Italiensk mad <3

Jamen det kan da bare være lige meget!

Kender du de at du før eller senere bare føler at det hele kunne rende dig et vist sted, hvis det ikke var fordi du ellers prøvede at opretholde et image som et ordenligt og fornuftigt menneske?

Hmm. Tænkte det nok.
Sådanne perioder er vi alle i før eller siden og jeg var så "heldig" at opleve min i går.
Jeg er 25 år og står med en fejlslåen uddannelse bag mig, en uddannelse som endnu ikke har åbnet nogen elevplads op for mig (har søgt i over et år nu) og jeg har måtte droppe min drøm om at blive animator, da jeg ikke har den store chance for at få et job bagefter.

Det har ført til jeg sådan set bare tænkte det hele kan være lige meget.
Krisen efterlader ikke meget spille rum for os som faktisk vil blive til noget, og selvom det lyder fristende, så ønsker jeg ikke at forblive akademiker resten af mit liv.

Ja det er den type følelser hvor man bare føler man er en stor fiasko, og man gør det dummeste et menneske kan gøre. Man sammenligner sig selv med andre: Jamen bo har allerede børn, kone, færdig uddannelse og job, hvorfor er jeg så den der skal sidde her og se dum ud?
25 år, bor i lejlighed med min kæreste og har ikke engang en færdig uddannelse bag mig (udover min HF).

Ja vi kan jo kun håbe tiderne vender snart, fordi dette er ikke just det som jeg gider bruge min tid på. Jeg vil uddannes og blive til noget, fordi jeg er socialistisk og rød som mit hår.

This old Chestnut again?

Sometimes I get scared over how much I can still carry a grudge on a person or persons who did something to me a long time ago.
I still carry a huge grudge against Penny Lane for knowing they didn't want me after two weeks, but keep me for 5.
And I still carry a grudge on the girl who was responsible for me at the time, for not talking to me about the issues we apperently had with each other, like I wasn't worth it. Well screw her.

The other girsl were nice enough but this girl just really ticked me off.
When she wasn't there I fel much more at ease and I wasn't as scared of doing something wrong as when she was around me.
How could I be so scare of a girl who's almost 5 years younger then me.
She never talked to me and when I tried she just replied with a short sentance and I did all that just to try and lighten up the mode, but nope. She just ddn't like me.
I never got WHY she didn't like me or why she refused to take the talk with me.

Yes I did write a message on FB telling how frustratet I were that I apperently couldn't do ANYTHING right. And that I felt like I was treated as dirt by her. I didn't mean anything bag against Penny Lane as such, but just agains this... girl.
I should just let it go since what's done is done and there's nothing more to do about it. I just have to look forward and hope for a much brigther future, for what it looks now, I won't ever become a baker nor a Pastry chef. People won't hire anybody and I've just gotten to rejections from two bakeries and after over a year, this just gets... well I just get tired and lethargic.

If I don't find anything soon I'll have to find something else to do like University. But sadly the line I want to go to requires a mathematical level I don't have .___ .

Everything new.

I've decided to give my blog a new design since I felt like it needed it.
And sometimes you just have to redecorate something to give it a little new twist.
I don't know why I sort of just neglected this blog and I don't know why I haven't updated Lolota Shout out. I should get back to doing that since the lolita fashion world is spewing out new designs almost every week now.
But to make people a little bit happy I'll post a link to the photoshoot I made with Ophelia for the Danish lolita magazine Starlight Magazine.

Valentine's day.

I don't get why people get so worked up over an american-fied day that celebrates love and all that. But why focus it all on this day? Why not celebrate it every day and really pull out the heavy stuff when you have you anniversary?

Celebrate that you have been together for a whole YEAR and celebrate moreto come. And I also don't get young people and teenagers who get all mushy about celebrating they have been together for some weeks og months.

Have love really become something that is so volatile that you have to mark it for every month rather that a year? Isn't it more of an acomplishment that you are able to stay as a couple for a whole year, rather than just three months? Maybe it's just me who is stupid since I found my Hubby and have stayed with him for 7 years now. But we celebrate the years we spend together since it seems like it weighs more that "OMG! Today me and Jim have been together for three months! This is SOOO crazy! I luv' yo Jim <3"

Yeah I may have offended some of you, but this is just may view of Valentines day and how people tend to make love look like it's a fling they feel every now and then. Is "true love" really dead? It feels like it when you see all thode divorces that's roaming around now. It's like love has just died. I know our grandparents are from a different time and that back then it was tabu to get a divorce. But still. I get so happy when I seen people who STILL love each other after 10 years. or old people who can still sit on a bench, hand in hand after 40 years og marriage, and still look just as in love as when they were youngsters.

It makes me sad and I don't lnow what have happend.
I just hope that all these divorce cases die soon and people fin the person they truely wan't to live their lives with forever.

First impression of Tera.

Lately the market for MMOs has truly grown and more and more are coming into the market after Blizzard has sort of become some big lazy gits who hardly care abut their costumers anymore. This has lead to them loosing a lot of fans and therefor Blizzard is slowly loosing the tight grip they had on the MMO scene and all of a sudden new MMOs actually have a chance to succeeded.

Now back in the days Blizzard were truly the titan on the MMO market which meant that new MMOs hardly stood a chance against WoW and often ended up going down hill after a matter of weeks. Back then when a new MMO tried to get into the MMO market it was pretty much like trying to enter an Elephant sized room WITH and Elephant inside it, which means it was pretty much impossible.

But after Blizzard had sort of cheated and grown less and less worried of what their so called “loyal” fan base want and need, they have truly lost a lot of followers and that means that a lot of new MMOs actually have a chance to somehow survive the first week. So I took myself the pleasure of trying the Asian MMO “Tera” which will be released on the 3 of May 2012 (as far as I know) And this Monday I tried to look into this game.

I had first heard about it from The CynicalBrit (A.K.A TotalBiscuit) Who is currently down in Germany to test the game himself.
The first thing I noticed about the game was that the download, install and patching time was very long and went very slowly along. This is perhaps due to the fact that the game was download form the Asian servers and also that when I decided to download it some people were given a sneak peek key so they could try the game for one day. When I finally got the game down an tried to log in, the game had a lot of trouble finding the log ind server and after 10 tries I finally got into the game. There were only two servers to pick from and both were PvE which I would much rather play on that PvP (I pretty much hate PvP, haha).

So I tried to select a server and all of a sudden my game froze. I first thought that the game was trying to load but all of a sudden then game threw me out of the game and I was back at the log in screen. I tried to log in again but the game kept getting errors for a long time. Okay well this is a sneak peek so it’s not uncommon for a new gave to have some server trouble during a beta test or sneak peek.

The clock was around 13:00 and this problem lastet the entire day so people started to grow very angry with Frogster studios. Apperently there had been some troubles with the server somewhere which ment that the planned event did not proceed according to plan. well this was not a plus in my book but at least we were promised a compensation for the time lost during this event.

Later during monday the servers were up and I logged in to finally see what the game was about. The first thing that struck me was that the server screen was really beautiful and again there were only two servers. I choose one a proceeded to make my character.

Now a thing that truck me was that the characters were really beautiful but VERY Asian. You could choose from an arrange of different races and some were very Asian to look at. The character creation is very neat but sort of lack more options to make your character since there are a lot of preset choices from the beginning. Now one thing that struck me as annoying is that the some of the races were too androgynous to my taste, or they were overly sexy so that you know that lonesome guys will choose these female creatures just to look at the slutty design and wank to it. Now another thing stat stung my eyes was the choice in armor. The androgynous, sexy, and cute races only had anime armor, now what is an anime armor? An anime armor is an armor that would NEVER have any protecting function in real life and is only meant to look cute, beautiful or bad ass, which means that a lot of thighs, stomach and cleavage will appear (again too much fan service to my taste. Yes I know “lol! Dat Bcuz U iz W0man. U fnd it sexist!”)

So I finally chose the Popori race (A series of different animal heads and tails which you can combine to your liking) and now I had to choose the class. Now all races in here can be all classes ans I personally don’t mind that. Again the Asian fell shun trough. All the classes had overly prettified armor (or lack of in some of the women’s cases) and big fucking weapons, again a classic trait of the Asian world (you also see it in a lot of animes). I end up choosing the archer since I am normally more secure in the role as Rage DPS rather than Magic user or the role of Melee dmg or Tank.

So when you are done with all this you see a little cutscene with some of the races you can choose from, but the cutscene itself is short and a waste of time. It doesn’t explaine anything and you don’t even get a reason to why the hell YOU are a part of all this and what you are doing here. You just get dropped down somewhere and start the game.

Now the sceneries of this game is breathtakingly beautiful and even on LOW graphics setting the game was stunning.
The UI is REALLY weird and and I couldn’t really handle the way you had to talk and loot. All of that was bound by the F key and it felt very awkward. Plus all your attacks were bound to left and right mouse button since your camera is automatically locked to your mouse. The UI all in all was very unpleasant to look at and it just felt like this game was more ment for the console users rather than the PC user.

So I went on to my first quest and the very first thing you had to do was grind. Wow… grind? You have to understand that I mainly have a hard time with Asian MMOs since their main way of leveling is trough grinding because apparently Asians loooooove their grind fest and I didn’t like it all. All the quest I tried contained of “kill X of those things. Now Kill X of THOSE things” and I hate grinding. I know it is part of an MMO but it it’s almost the ONLY way to level, then I don’t like it at all.

Okay… grinding yeah… So as I grinded my ways trough the quest I noticed one more thing. The quests were terribly boring! I didn’t even BOTHER reading most of then since they all seem bland, boring and like the didn’t really want to do much about. Okay.. well… that’s a bunch of bull crap to give me served on a silver platter.
The game also did an amazing job of makng me feel like I weren’t the hero who is suppose to save the world here but more like you are your own little hero in your own little game, much like WoW did, and that just made me feel like weren’t part of the history of the game at all. Like the entire story of the world wouldn’t care a crap-ton if I was part of it or not. HUGE minus since an MMO has to make you feel you are either the hero of the game, or your actions WILL actually change the fate or history of the world you are in.

Wow. Well maybe it’s just me so let’s move on. Now the Map is just horrible! It’s hard to see where you have to go to complete or accept quests, and where you have to go to kill the different monsters (hey I’m one of those who like that) and that made me run around in circles more than once in order for me to try and find that one stupid mob had to kill on order to get a small amount of gold and some crappy item. Also they are HORRIBLE at making one measly mark to show “Trainer is here” so I could get some new skills and I used a lot of time trying to find that ONE trainer. Now also A better description the the quests would really do wonders. Some quests were so badly written that I had to abandon some quests purely because I couldn’t find that ONE thing I was looking for.

One thing that also hit my eyes was the animation when you attack. Some of it it’s just too flashy and sparkly and I didn’t really care much for the little blood splatter dmg note that showed over the head of your enemy as your attacks hit them. And again the availability of your special abilities was hard to access and was places very weird compared to the mouse control. One of my attacks mas locate don the space bar (I didn’t put it there, the game did that itself) and it was just so misplaced for me that I often ended up activating it by a accident.

One thing I did like about the game was that the emotions of the Poporin is very cute and I like how they react to a successfull gathering of minerals or herbs, or if they fail it. I tried that just to see how it wen’t and can’t say much to that other than it’s very bland.

So I reached level 10 and decided to stop for now and hope for a beta testing. But all in all the game lacks a lot of stuff. Sure the game IS beautiful but it seems like it’s trying to make the game appear interesting only by it’s beauty instead of its actual content and that will probably end up killing the game in the long run. The quest are boring, the history ins bland and you don’t get the feel of you being a part of a huge event nor does it give you the impression of you being the hero that is suppose to save the day. The outfits are ridicules and only meant to look pretty rather that being functional, and some races are just too fan service oriented that It’s just stupid. I hope that this game doesn’t go P2P since I am pretty sure that it won’t last a month with so many features missing. Again this is still in production so I do hope that a lot of the issues I have mentioned will be taken care of. If not, this game is doomed to end in the gutter.

And I wouldn’t be surprised if a lot of boys ended up playing the female characters, so they have some polygons to jerk off to. Lol.

Promotion Video for Tera.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GFlTEZELrbw

Just ONE last note to Tera.
WTF IS UP WITH THOSE WEIRD ASS TITS IN THE GAME!
How the hell do the jiggle so much!?
Have you SEEN real breasts? (I would say no) They don’t MOVE like that.
It’s not like they fly all over the place when hit by the tiniest blow of wind.
Fix it, it’s just plane stupid, no really, it IS.
I saw boobs clapping together on a woman who just stood there.
BOOBS. CLAPPING. TOGETHER!

Totally Okay if you said TL;DR

Shit Lolitas Say <--- Le link